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Six to Twelve Months before "Our Marriage"

  • First things First. . . Determine your wedding date.
  • Choose the style and formality of your wedding which best suits your lifestyle and personality.  "Classic Formal," "Formal," "Semi-Formal" or "Informal."
  • Discuss your wedding budget.  "Who pays for what?"
  • Will your parents contribute?
  • Choose a color scheme and theme for your wedding.
  • Explore possible chapels, churches or synagogue locations.  Be sure to put a security deposit on your desired selection.  Remember - to guarantee your favorite wedding and reception site, reservations must often be made a year or more in advance.
  • Choose your honor attendants, bridesmaids, groomsmen, and ushers, requesting their participation in your ceremony.
  • Carefully select a bridal gown and veil to reflect your personality and style.  When you find the gown of your dreams, order it immediately.  It often requires a minimum of three to four months for a special order  gown to arrive from the factory.  Allow additional time for alterations and final fittings. Be prepared to make at least a 50% deposit.  There are NO REFUNDS on wedding gown purchases.  Be sure of your selection! If it is a one-of-a-kind gown and no longer reorderable, or on a sale rack, buy it today.  In some areas, rental of your wedding gown may be an option to consider.
  • Select your bridesmaid gowns and accessories.  Place gown orders, for each maid, at the same time, to assure an identical dye lot.
  • Interview caterers, if not already included in your favored reception site.  Once you have made your final choice, be sure to secure the date with a signed contract and a security deposit.  Here again, be certain of your selection, as your deposit may well be nonrefundable in the event you cancel or change your date.
  • Compile your guest list.  Remember, you have five lists to combine and refine.  Yours, his, your family's, his family's and your master list of the four. When the  guest list must be kept to a specific or limited number, be sure to give your family's the number of guests they may add to their list.  Do this when you request the list, rather than after you receive it, to keep from having hurt feelings in the event you must eliminate names.
  • Begin interviewing wedding photographers, videographers and musicians.  In many areas, it may behoove you to make your selection and put a deposit on your date to insure their availability for your event.  Because your deposits will likely be nonrefundable, and many times, nontransferable, be certain of your date and time before placing your reservation.
  • Engagement parties are appropriate during this time.
  • Also see "Pre-Wedding Parties and Events."
  • Send your engagement announcement to the local newspaper.

Four to Six Months Before "Our Marriage"

  • Obtain the completed guest lists from fiancé and both families.  Compile your final master list to determine the number of invitations and announcements to be ordered.
  • Also see "How to Order Invitations for Our Marriage"
  • Select your wedding cake, giving careful consideration to style, flavors, size, decoration and color.  Consider fresh flowers and strings of removable pearls. Also see "Tips on Cutting and Serving your Wedding Cake"
  • Order wedding invitations, announcements, thank you cards and personal stationary.
  • Reserve your florist, plan your floral display and order all wedding flowers. Also see "Flowers for Our Marriage"
  • Choose your wedding music, secure musicians and soloists. Also see "Music for Remarriage"
  • Consult with your travel agent and discuss honeymoon destinations. Make arrangements early for lowest airfares.

Three to Four Months Before "Our Marriage"

  • Select Mothers gowns and accessories.  Order immediately if not in hanging stock. Also see "Responsibilities of the Mother of the Bride" and "Responsibilities of the Mother of the Groom"
  • Select tuxedos' for your groom, his attendants and fathers of the couple. Measurements should be submitted to the tux shop within the next month. It is preferable for  attendants to be measured at the formal wear shop to insure proper fit and minimize returns and exchanging garments the morning of the wedding.
  • Arrange accommodations for out-of-town guests.
  • Arrange transportation or limousine service for the wedding party to the ceremony and reception.
  • Discuss final menu options and costs with your caterer.  Confirm arrival and departure times.  Also see "When Choosing a Caterer for Remarriage"
  • Order wedding favors and imprinted items such as napkins, matches and engraved attendant gifts.
  • Arrange for rental of items needed for your ceremony and reception.  Items such as, candelabras, arches, alter baskets, kneeling bench, flowing punch fountains, china, crystal, flatware and silver serving accessories, if desired.
  • Begin counseling sessions with wedding officiant when required.

Six to Eight Weeks Before "Our Marriage"

  • Begin addressing invitations and announcements.
  • Draw map to ceremony and reception for inclusion in your invitation.
  • Finalize your "Order of Service" for the ceremony and order wedding program.
  • Arrange for physical examinations and blood tests if required to obtain marriage license in your state.
  • Select a location for your rehearsal dinner and make necessary reservations.
  • Confirm formal wear shop has received measurements of your male attendants.  Follow up immediately with anyone not yet fitted.
  • Schedule alterations and final fitting for your wedding gown.
  • Schedule fittings for bridesmaids and flower girls.
  • Finalize honeymoon plans and confirm reservations.
  • Make arrangements for your "Bridesmaid Luncheon" and other "Pre-Wedding Parties and Events".

Four to Six Weeks before "Remarriage"

  • Discuss and finalize details with your:
  • Pastor/Officiant Church Soloist
  • Caterer Florist Baker/Cake Decorator
  • Bridal Shop Tux Shop Limo Service
  • Photographer Videographer Travel Agent
  • Musicians/DJ Jeweler/Engraver Rehearsal Dinner Site
  • Schedule appointment with hairdresser for bride, attendants and mothers.  A popular alternative today is to hire a hairdresser and makeup artist to meet with the wedding party at the church.
  • Send Wedding Invitations four weeks prior to your wedding date to local/regional guests.  Guests needing to make travel arrangements should receive their invitation six weeks in advance.
  • Attend parties given in your honor.

Two to Four Weeks before "Our Marriage"

  • Apply for your marriage license.  Be sure to call ahead for a list of required documents.
  • Confirm rehearsal plans with your officiant and church wedding coordinator.
  • Send Thank You Cards as gifts begin to arrive. 
  • Also see "How to Write a Thank You Card."
  • Arrange to move belongings to your new home.
  • Arrange for name change, as necessary.
  • Bank Accounts Driver License Vehicle Registration
  • Passport Post Office Social Security Card
  • Credit Cards Voter Registration Insurance Policies
  • Subscriptions Dr./Dental Records Employment Records

One to Two Weeks before "Our Marriage"

  • Host "Bridesmaid Luncheon." Give attendants' gifts at this time.
  • Confirm rehearsal plans with attendants and request their timely arrival.
  • Confirm reservations for "Rehearsal Dinner."
  • Confirm reservations for out-of-town guests
  • Confirm final guest count to caterer.
  • Delegate last minute errands and details.
  • Groom's "Bachelor Party" should be at least one week prior to wedding.
  • Pack your "Wedding Survival Kit"
  • Begin Packing for your honeymoon.

The Day before "Our Marriage"

  • Decorate for ceremony and reception, if possible, early in the day.  Confirm delivery times with your party rental shop.
  • Keep your appointment for manicure and pedicure.
  • Arrive thirty minutes early for rehearsal to greet your attendants.
  • Attend "Rehearsal Dinner."
  • Present attendants with your gift of appreciation during the rehearsal dinner, if not given previously  at the
  • "Bridesmaid Luncheon" or "Bachelor Party."
  • Give Best Man the officiant's fee in a sealed
  • "Thank You Card" for delivery after the ceremony.
  • Get a good nights sleep.



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